01/08/25: Ironic that lately I have felt like I am “just breathing”. The timing of these prompts is sometimes interesting, to say the least. Post is unchanged from last year.
The name of that Killswitch Engage album is always in the back of my head.
When I feel low, I often find myself asking “Am I alive, or just breathing?”
There is a huge difference.
I have spent more years than I care to count “just breathing.” Quite recently, in fact.
I hit damn near rock bottom both mentally and physically. It took that for me to truly understand that I was not alive. Technically? Sure. Really? Nope.
Personally, I don’t recommend learning it the way I did. There are much easier ways to go about it.
I see a lot of folks out there that feel similar to how I felt. Hell, I still do sometimes. Not like I’ve found the golden key yet.
I read your stories and I feel your pain. I understand it. We all suffer to different degrees, but we’re suffering nonetheless.
But I’m making a plea to you now. If you are out there and you’re “just breathing”, please…Start living.
Be thankful for the smallest blessing if that’s all you’ve got right now. Start there and build on it. Day by day try to feel just a little bit more alive.
Start living now and when the Grim Reaper comes knocking on your door with that wicked grin on his face, you can look that son of a bitch dead in the eye and smile right back.
Why? Because you will have the satisfaction of knowing you went through life alive.
The Beginning At Last 
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