Might as well jump

Credit to the great Zen philosopher David Lee Roth for today’s title.

I was talking to a dear friend and former colleague last night who has recently applied for another position within my former company.

She is looking for a work from home opportunity and a better rate of pay.

She emigrated from overseas about four years ago and had to start all over after a career as a teacher in her native country. When she first came to work in our company, it was an entry level position and she struggled greatly with this.

But with time and perseverance, she was able to move into a role in the offices which suited her talent and skill level.

We developed a very close bond and I can proudly say she is one of my best friends.

When I was fired from my job, she was the first to reach out and check on me, which I am eternally grateful for.

We keep in close contact, talk daily and share each other’s fears and dreams quite freely. My wish for everyone is to have a friend like that. A friend who will comfort you, nurture you and call you out on your b.s. is one you should never let go of.

She had an interview yesterday and from all accounts it went very well. They will be scheduling a second interview for her very soon, which is totally awesome. I am beyond happy for her. When we were talking last night, she told me about the interview and how well it went.

She also told me that she couldn’t help but feel guilty about the whole thing and she couldn’t understand why.

She said her manager was very supportive of her and it bothered her in sense. I told her that one of the signs of a good leader is that he or she encourages their team to grow and improve. A good leader also wouldn’t try to hold anyone back.

As we drilled down into the topic, I also suggested to her that a sense of familiarity is probably causing some of her misgivings. Despite the fact that she is no longer happy in her current situation, it’s all she’s known since she came here and for better or worse, there is a level of comfort in that.

One of the other big, if not biggest pieces, is probably a fear of the unknown. When a potential change is staring you in the face, the unknown elements start to creep in.

What if I hate it?

What if I suck at it?

Will my current team hate me for abandoning them?

What if I don’t like the new team I’m working with?

All valid questions in their own unique way.

In an odd way, I am lucky that the choice to move on was forced upon me. I have no choice but to face the unknown. Yes, it’s a bit scary, but a bit exciting at the same time.

If it hadn’t unfolded the way it did, I’d likely still be working far too many days/hours, sleeping way too little and driving myself to an early grave. Just for starters.

Since losing my job, I have been able to:

Explore other income opportunities.

Rest, reflect and understand the things that are truly important in life.

Start this blog, which has been a very fun and enjoyable experience so far.

The world once again feels wide open to possibilities. Possibilities for a fresh start, to improve myself and find my true purpose.

I just got off the phone with her a few minutes ago, and we talked through her fears and misgivings.

I reminded her that despite the guilt she may be feeling, it won’t sting nearly as much as the pain of regret.

I reminded her that loyalty, while an incredible trait, needs to be to yourself, your needs and values first and foremost.

She owes no one any debt for her success. She earned that success through hard work and sheer dedication. And even if she did owe a debt, it’s been paid in full with interest.

Whether you are forced into a situation where you have to face the unknown, or it is a completely free choice, there will always be an element of fear and reservation.

You will be faced with multiple maybes and what ifs.

But sometimes instead of “what if”, try asking yourself “why not?”

Now I think I’ll go listen to some Van Halen.